Friday, February 20

My laptop is being fixed and I’m way too busy but I’m posting this foolishness anyway.

Ten reasons to think you may be too politically correct or too much of a lefty:
10. You call coca cola ‘Colombian workers’ blood’
9. You know the difference between a Spartacist and a Healyite
8. You argued that Henry Kissinger in a war criminal during a social conversation
7. You called for someone’s resignation because they used the word ‘niggardly’
6. You know what COINTELPRO was
5. You harbor a secret desire to murder Jack Welch
4. You regularly get upset about stuff the CIA did in Central America in the 1950s
3. You get a warm glow when you use public transport
2. You care about who killed JFK
1. You call pizzas ‘oppression discs’

Ten reasons to think you may be too politically apathetic:
10. You have no idea what COINTELPRO was
9. You think Central America is near Iowa
8. You would be ashamed to use public transport
7. You own a book by Jack Welch
6. You think of baseball when someone mentions the labor movement
5. You think that Saddam Hussein was responsible for September 11th
4. You think that Howard Dean is radical left winger
3. You get confused during West Wing episodes
2. You care about who killed JFK
1. You think that your new low carb diet is a way to stick it to the man

Some random notes about the first list:
Number 10 - Actually, there’s nothing wrong with calling Coke ‘Colombian workers’ blood (see
Number 9 - refers to some obscure Trotskyite sects
Number 7 - refers to a real incident in Washington DC (‘niggardly’ is an old English word with no racial connotations despite its vague phonetic similarity to a slur).
Number 6 – you really should know what COINTELPRO was, google it if you don’t.
Number 5 – hey, who doesn’t?
Number 1 – this probably has something to do with the fact that I sometimes had to separate anchovies by hand when I worked in a pizza place.

Some random notes about the second list:
Number 5 – more than 50% of Americans are so spectacularly uninformed that they think 5 is true
Number 4 – Dean supports the death penalty, is admired by the gun lobby and governed Vermont as a centrist. Also, Vermont’s civil union law was a result of a court order, not Dean (you are not a left winger just for yelling on stage).


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